Let’s look at a few ways to develop self-awareness in kids

Antoinette Steyn • March 25, 2021

Focus on the type of feedback you give:

 

Often times, a parent’s shy away from giving their kids critical feedback.  Some parent’s belief that it will only ruin their child’s level of confidence or harm their self-esteem.  It is important that parents give constructive feedback in such a way that their kids will understand that feedback can help them learn more about the situation in which they find themselves and more about themselves. Remember

 the following when giving your child feedback:

 

We all make mistakes and so will your kids.  We cannot protect them at the expense of not telling them what they need to hear.  If we do not give our kids honest feedback, they can miss out on important learning and growth opportunities.  When we go too “easy” on our kids we sometimes take away their responsibilities. 

It can place them under the impression that they tried their best and can lead to them feeling powerless and unable to improve.

 

Be specific in your feedback.  With specific feedback, we can help our kids identify what exactly went wrong and what they can do to improve.  With specific feedback, we can also teach kids more about the concept of what is 

“in their control” and “what is out of their control”

 

Be specific in your praise.  If we only say things to a child such as: “you are so clever, that is why you are doing this so well”, it can cause them to end up in a situation where they fail at something and think that in this instance they were not smart enough.  Rather praise specific steps they took or certain aspects of an approach they made use of. 

Specific praise can also be aimed at making use of certain life skills such as having shown self-control in a certain situation.

 

Help your child see the positive in negative situations

 

We are confronted with negative information on a daily basis.  Instead of just taking in this negative information it is important for parents to help their kids look for the good in the bad.  By using simple examples, parents can help their kids develop thought patterns aimed at finding the positive side of a negative situation. 

 

Help your child derive meaning from their experiences;

 

Deriving meaning from experiences will require us to take into consideration elements such as the privilege of being able 

to do certain things, thankfulness towards having certain skills and equipment and appreciation for circumstances.

 

Help your child define their values

 

When we develop good values in our child from a young age it improves the chances of having a child who will take their 

values into consideration when making important choices later in life. 


Cultivate thankfulness

 

Being thankful and appreciative can help us take better care of ourselves, our environment, our emotional needs and relationships.

 

Learn to grown from pain

 

Sometimes our greatest lessons in life are learned by changing the way we look at our challenges. 

Sometimes our challenges serve us greater than our victories.  Help your child discover the important lessons which they can learn from negative or painful situations.

 

Learn how to lead through serving

 

Kids need to be taught when to give and when to take.  Being able to incorporate serving into our leadership 

style can help kids become the kind of leader others will want to follow.

 

Be curious

 

As parents, we don’t always have to have all the answers.  We don’t have to step in and take control of every situation either. 

Sometimes great parenting skills include taking a step back and being curious.  This includes allowing your child to fail sometimes, 

to observe them and show appreciation for the insight they show in certain situations.  It also involves taking a step back and  ensuring them that we believe and them and their abilities to do certain things on their own.

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